Yatra

If Yoga Sutra of Patanjali is a path then it’s end goal is defined by Shiva Sutra. In the early 800s, Shri Vasugupta was living on Mahadeva Mountain near Srinagar (Kashmir). Tradition states that one night Lord Siva appeared to him in a dream and told him of the whereabouts of a great scripture carved in rock. Upon awakening, Vasugupta rushed to the spot and found seventy-seven verses of sutras etched in stone, which he named the Siva Sutras.

 The Non-dual Kashmir Shaivism is built on the foundation of Shiva Sutra. Kashmir Shaivism, reached its culmination in the philosophy of Abhinavagupta and Kshemaraja (tenth to eleventh century AD).

The Kashmir Shaivism is also called Trika (Threefold) Philosophy. This three-fold division is sometimes represented in terms of it’s key aspects: siva, sakti, and anu or pati, pasa, pasu . Siva represents the principle of supreme transcendental consciousness, sakti its energy, and anu the individual being. At the level of living beings pasu is the individual who acts according to his/her conditioning, almost like an animal, pasa are the bonds (karmic, instinctual and habitual) that tie them to their behavior, and pati or pasupati (Lord of the Flock) is Siva personified whose knowledge liberates the pasu and makes it possible for her/him to reach their infinite potential. 

In Kashmir Shaivism, the  consciousness of self-realized person ebbs and flows between an identity of ‘individual self ‘and ‘Siva’, which is the infinite consciousness in which all cosmos are embedded. Kashmir Saivism is strongly monistic and provides an extremely rich and detailed understanding of the human psyche, and a clear and distinct path of kundalini-siddha yoga to the goal of Self Realization.

In the search for peace, enlightenment and Liberation, no path is more tolerant, more mystical, more widespread or more ancient than Saivite Hinduism. Saivism is not, therefore, a school or philosophy; it is a way of life in itself.

The Kashmir Shaivism has a pragmatic approach towards the problems of life. It is not idealistic and it considers Cosmos as real for all practical purposes. Everything exists in the absolute reality in the form of pure limitless abundance and all comprehending luminious-supreme-consciousness. That supreme consciousness is called ‘Parama Siva’. The universe is nothing but an objective manifestation of His divine powers. He is the reality and his powers are his essence and real.

The Kashmir Saivism is not about the deliverance of the Soul from Maya (delusion of polrities.) It is about the divinization of the Self, which means the recognition of our own identity with Parma Shiva.

“Kashmir Shaivism has penetrated to that depth of living thought where diverse currents of human wisdom unite in a luminous synthesis.”
- Rabindranath Tagore

The Shiva Sutra is divided into three paths, one paths leads to other making it as one whole method (or upaya). The first is Anvopaya (or Atomic Path) and is concerned with ‘anu’ – a limited being. The path defines a way that allows individual to use his mental capacity to release one from the ignorance of his true self. In this method (upaya) all the faculties of cognition are to be concentrated upon a particular external objects other than the self, and then self is to be experienced with the help of those particular objective entities. This is also known as Kriyayoga, because of concentration on external object. This yoga involves sufficient mental effort and action. Thus action (of mind on external objects) plays significant part in reaching up to this stage. This path is very similar to Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra and involves asanas and pranayams to clean the nadis, and doing dharana/dhyana of external objects to develop the power of concentration. This is where Yoga Sutra ends.

Anaovpaya leads one to second path or method – The Shaktopaya (method of using inner-power or shakti). In Shaktopaya the activities of inner meditation are the most important factor. Thus it is an indirect means to (using inner meditation instead of direct love) complete the liberation. In Shri Vijnana Bhairava a traditional treatise of this method, one hundred and twelve ways are explained to attain the state of absorbtion in inner-vibration by meditating on the central nadi (sushmana) in the dreambody. All the practices of ‘Shakti’ are connected with this path of Shiva Sutra. In this method the guidence of a living teacher who has realized their true-self is necessary. Through the grace of shaktipat from living teacher inner-vibrations unfold. It is a yogic practice of attention and intention. The seeker has to develop concentration upon Shiva consciousness by means of a inner practice unfolded by the master. The definition of Shaktopaya is given in Shri Malinivijaya Tantra as :- When the aspirant concentrates on the particular inner vibration of Shiva-consciousness without the support of Pranayama and chanting of mantras etc, he develops that consciousness uninterruptedly. That state is called Shaktopaya.

  
Shaktopaya the leads one to Shambavopaya, which is a path, shown by the inner-master, in which the knowledge of the ultimate reality comes through the practice of emptying one’s consciousness of all its contents and then whole-being is completely absorbed in the inner-vibration of Shiva-consciousness, i.e., Love. Shambavopaya is meant for those who have fully developed their awareness of chit-consciousness and individual mind or ego-self is dissolved by inner-love of Shiva-consciousness, everything then arises and dissolves like a dream in their heart. 

I saw myself in all things
I saw God shining in everything.
You have heard, stop! see Shiva
The house is his, who am I Lalla.

Shiva pervades the world
Hindu and Muslim are the same.
If you are wise know yourself
Then you will know God.

 He is in me, I am in Him.
I experienced bliss in his company.
It was futile of me to seek Him in an alien land.
I found- Him in my own country-my own self.

He is here, He is there, He pervades all.
He is all-in-all, concealed and transcendent.
~ Lalleshvari (1335-1376).

AUM NAMAH SHIVAYA

I often wonder whether we ‘create’ the purpose of our life or ‘discover’ it?  What can make someone leave their country, possessions, neighborhood, relatives, go to a strange place, and live as refugees so that they can be with their Guru or Lama?

The only answer is: love and devotion. These people inherently know that the essence of phenomena is impermanence which is the root of our suffering. And one way to realize the true nature of reality (or the way out of suffering) is to find someone who has done it and is capable guiding others. That’s where the need of Guru/Lama comes in picture. The compassion and presence of these spiritual teachers fill the hearts of their followers with love and devotion.

The stories of city of Amritsar (lit. pool of nectar of immortality) and Dharamsala (lit. place of refuge for pilgrims) are very similar. Both cities were founded by spiritual teachers and populated by their followers, although at different times.

The Golden Temple

The city of Amritsar (Punjab, India) was founded by Sikh Guru Ram Das in 1574. It has the Golden Temple which is the most sacred place in Sikh religious tradition. It was built by Sikh Guru Arjan Dev and its foundation stone was laid by his friend, a Muslim Sufi Saint, Mian Mir Sahib in 1588. The city is built on the love of Sikh Gurus and their followers.

Dhauladhar range

McLeodganj, a suburb of city of Dharamsala (Himachal Pradesh, India), is at the foot of the evergreen Dhauladhar range filled with stately and beautiful Deodar trees. Blessed with dense forests, Tibetan monasteries and spiritual environment, tranquility is often just a short walk away. In 1960, Indian Government offered refuge to HH Dalai Lama in Dharamshala, where he set up the Government of Tibet in exile and McLeodganj became his official residence. Dharamshala has become home to several Buddhist monasteries and thousands of Tibetan refugees who followed their beloved Lama.

Blessed are the spiritual teachers and their followers who remind us that there is more to life then mundane sensory experience. Even in the most helpless moments of life they are able to love in simple and ultimate way.

“My heart yearns for a sight of the Guru
And it wails like a chatrik (rainbird)
My thirst remains unquenched and I find no peace
without a glimpse of my Beloved Satguru
I am ever a sacrifice unto a blessed vision of my beloved Satguru
Blissful is Thy face and Wisdom-Divine flows from your Holy Lips ”
~ Guru Arjan Dev

The strength of fire is not defined by the size of wood but by the flow of wind. A shift in wind can change the mood and form of fire. And similarly, the stillness of our mind (which is the ultimate goal of Yoga) is defined by flow of our internal winds. Hatha Yoga Pradipika says, “as wind moves, the mind moves; stillness in one, brings the stillness to other”.  The mysterious flower of inner-stillness has been “the goal” of yogis, tantriks, sages and everyone else that are on the path of finding their true essence or the very ground of their being.

Stillness also became the concluding part of my yatra. Every sacred ritual, ceremony, yatra or journey has beginning, middle and end. Even the journey of esoteric Kundalini goes through three stages, in the beginning is the rise of heat in sacrum and lower lumbar spine. The heat is at least ten times more than the heat experienced in sexual arousal. In the next stage the energy of Kundalini travels up through spine. It feels like hot water stream rising up towards the head and it travels like a snake. In final stage, the energy penetrates into the head and the whole body tingles with energetic sensation. One feels very light and hears clicking sounds inside the head as if hundred of tiny lotuses are crackling, unfolding and opening. Nothing externally changes, however the internal life and perception is completely changed, forever.

My yatra began at Fes, Morocco and then continued to Muktinath, Nepal and concluded with the Kora (skt. parikrima) or the circumambulating of Mt. Kailash, Tibet. The ‘Mountain’ in external reality is symbolic of Stillness and it’s visualized image, internally is an archetype of the same.

His Holiness the Dalai Lama has written, “…if people are so highly developed spiritually that they can practice their religions effectively by staying in one place, even in some unholy place, then a pilgrimage may not be important for them….Many ordinary people, however, especially those who find religion difficult to practice in a devout way in their normal lives, set off on long journeys with the hope of communicating virtue and gaining merit.” Obviously, I fall into the category of ‘ordinary people’.

Mt. Kailash is considered as a sacred place in five religious traditions: Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism, Ayyavazhi and the Bön Po faith. In Hinduism, it is considered to be the abode of Lord Shiva and as a place of eternal bliss and transformation. To the Buddhist it is the kingdom of Demchok, a wrathful manifestation of Shakyamuni, the Historical Buddha. The Jains believe their saints were emancipated here, and the Bon Po (the ancient religion of Tibet) believe that their founder alighted from heaven here.

The mandala ( or field) of Mt. Kailash is the source of four of the longest rivers in Asia (the Indus, the Sutlej, the Brahmaputra, and the Karnali river, which is a tributary of the Ganges River) and two lakes, the Lake Manasarowar (highest body of fresh water in the world) and Lake Rakshastal. The word Kailash means “crystal” in Sanskrit. The Tibetan name for the mountain is Khang Rinpoche, meaning “precious jewel of snows”. According to one description in the Vishnu Purana, Mount Kailash is the center of the world, its four faces are made of crystal, ruby, gold, and sapphire and and is located at the heart of six mountain ranges symbolizing a lotus.

Every year, thousands make a pilgrimage to Kailash, following a tradition going back thousands of years. Guru Nanak, Nath Yogis, Milarepa, Guru Rinpoche (Padmasambhava), 84 Maha-Siddhas, Pandav Kings and many other Indian & Tibetan sages and Kings have come here to meditate (or transition into the next life) in the abode of Mt Kailash and Lake Mansarovar. Milarepa, the Great Tibetan Yogi and Saint said, “There is no place more powerful for practice, more blessed, or more marvelous than this; may all pilgrims and practitioners be welcome!” It is said that one can not go to Mt. Kailash until they are called by the Mountain. My call came two years ago when the vivid image of Mt. Kailash came to me in a dream-journey and since then it has graced me in many visions and lucid dreams.

We started our travel from Kathmandu, passing through Trans-Himalayan high dessert of Western Tibet. Journey through Tibetan High Dessert had a feeling of passing between the worlds. On the way we stopped few nights to acclimatize with high altitude and also visited sacred Tibetan monasteries and caves of yogis to mentally and spiritually prepare for the Mt. Kailash-Kora.

The dreamscapes of high dessert are impossible to describe, even with photos or brush, the beauty that sun paints is very evocative and amazingly beautiful. The hostile terrain of dessert, mixed with expansive vistas, haunting solitude, and emptiness forces us to withdraw in meditative states. This was time for me to be free of worries, free of what is next or what might be… and let go of all the baggage and get to simply who i am, right now, in present moment, with no expectations or regrets whatsoever. The ‘acclimatization journey’ helped me in creating an internal space by learning to let go of everything that would not have helped me in getting to Mt Kailash and that includes my ’sense of achievement’ and pride.

Someone, once told me, “You can’t grab God. You just have to become still and empty. Then God will have place to enter.” Lama Govinda wrote, “Nobody can approach the Throne of the Gods, or penetrate the Mandala of Shiva or Demchog, or whatever name he likes to give to the mystery of ultimate reality, without risking his life—and perhaps even the sanity of his mind.” The sacred mountain can invoke supreme bliss in us, but it is not easily gained. One has to be completely empty and humble then only transformation happens.

One thing that I wanted to work with while doing Mt. Kailash-Kora was my ‘fear of non-accomplishment’. I have a deep fear that if I am not accomplishing something than I will fade away. This fear has kept me busy, productive and materially comfortable. On the other side, it has created dislike in me for ‘non-productivity’, and sometime I become ‘edgy and mean’ if planned things go ‘out of control’ or become unproductive. The worst aspect of this fear is the expectation of having a ‘productive meditation’ session! I wish to transform this ‘fear’ into ‘openness and equanimity’ to all aspects of life.

The Kailash-Kora starts and ends from a small town called Darchen. This is also where we had the first sight if Kailash. The winds and clouds had created a formation of giant spinal column in the sky and one end of it was pointing directly to Mt. Kailash. As if the winds were reminding us that Mt. Kailash is crown chakra of earth and we were in its mandala.

In the morning after a short walk along the mountain we came at the first prostration point of the the kora from where we can see the south face of Mt. Kailash. There is a Chorten, and Tarbocje (flagpole) which is being replaced every year in a saga dawa festival (celebrated on the day of Buddha’s enlightenment). All around are prayer flags, mani stones, and over the cliff is sky burial place of 84 Maha-Siddhas.

The first day’s journey through valley was breath-taking, the giant mountains on both side felt like the walls and pillars of an endless cathedral. The wind was chilly, crisp and growing in strength as I got closer to the end-point of first day. The end point of the first day was about 20 km up the valley and 200 meters higher in altitude near Dirapuk Monastery, opposite the majestic north face of Mt. Kailash.

In couple of hours the weather started to get worst, it started to rain and which quickly became snow. Wind was roaring and it’s whispering become harsh shrills. The Mt. Kailash became invisible, covered with thick veil of fog and snow. Next day was a rest day, however, everyone was worried about day-after which was suppose to be most difficult one. We all hoped for better weather.

 The night was filled with most vivid dreams. The whispers and shrills of outer winds were working on the inner winds and mind was lit with brilliant show of light, sound and color. As if all my wrathful fears were being transformed into peaceful forces.  All night I tried to lay still and witness the inner battle however, it became increasing overwhelming and I remember passing-out to other side.

Next day morning, sky was dark and there was no sign of Mt. Kailash. The snow and chilling wind continued, everyone was worried. People prayed and meditated in their own way for clear and nicer weather. My mind was calm and still. Something had changed inside and somehow I knew that everything will be fine by tomorrow. I was not ‘edgy’ and there was no eagerness to do something or ‘be productive or try to solve the problem’. The mountain had settled inside me.

The time had come to uncover and discover the Stillness of the Sacred Mountain and it’s relation to my inner Stillness. I continued to enjoy my inner Stillness and by after noon the sky became clear. The north face of Mt. Kailash was shining with all its glory and splendor. Although I was wearing five layers of clothing over my physical body but the Stillness of mountain was able to cut through everything (including any illusions—physical, mental, or emotional) and touch my heart directly. Standing in front of north face of Mt. Kailash, I understood something without reason or explanation. I have come home to myself, in complete Blissful Stillness. Stillness is the source of all movement. Blissful Stillness is the nature of Self [Ayam Atam Shantah]. Stillness is the central core of our being.

 I remembered the interview with Marie Louise von Franz’ first meeting with C. G. Jung (from “Matter of Heart” DVD): “He told that story which you can read in the Memories, about this girl who was on the moon and had to fight the demon, and the black demon got her. And he pretended, … he told it in a way as if she really had been on the moon, and it had happened. And I was very rationalistically trained from school, so I said indignantly, but she imagined to be on the moon, or she dreamt it, but she wasn’t on the moon. And he looked at me earnestly and said, yes, she was on the moon. I still remember looking over the lake there and thinking either this man is crazy or I am too stupid to understand what he means. And then suddenly it dawned on me – he means that what happens psychically is the real reality. And this other moon, this stony desert which goes round us, that’s illusional, that’s only pseudo-reality. And that hit me tremendously deeply. When I crawled rather drunk into bed, because he gave us a lot of Burgundy, that evening I thought it will take you ten years to digest what you experienced today.”

“What happens psychically is the real reality”. The truth about being human is that each one of us is always free to choose what meaning we attach to any given experience, internal or external. It is we who choose to be ‘victim’ or be larger than our fears. Wrathful and peaceful both are part of us and we give meaning to each one. Hopefully, meaning we choose is helpful to us and benefits all beings.

The next day of the Mt Kailash kora was the most difficult as soon as I passed Dirapuk monastery and crossed the Lha-Chu river, the route became increasingly treacherous. The steep path filled with fresh snow and frozen ice which eventually thinned out – as did the air into the Shiva-Tsal. Shiva-Tsal is the place where people come to die and transform it is littered with clothing and shanks of human hair that pilgrims leave behind to symbolize their death.

 After passing through Shiva-Tsal I started to make my way up the Drolma-La, to re-born. The path was filled with several inches of snow and frozen ice. I have not idea how I got up to Drolma-La pass (18,600ft) it was as if some wind carried me through it and the next thing I know, I was taking a rest in a tea tent down in the valley crowded with jovial Tibetans and some of the people from my group. The journey that day continued tracing the Dzong-Chu river until we came to our tent which was set two kilometers before the where Milarepa had meditated. That night I had most peaceful sleep. The temprature in the night dropped to freezing -15C.

The last days’ walk continued through valley which was filled with mani prayer walls, inscribed yak skulls and beautiful gorge. It ended into the mid-day sun at Darchen. Next day we were enjoying the mirror like magnificence of Lake Mansarovar. The beauty, solitude of Lake Mansarovar was very soothing and refreshing to my heart. It helped to digest the experience of Mt. Kailash-Kora. Few days later we took flight back to Kathmandu from Lhasa.

In Kathmandu, while strolling through ancient towns of Bhaktapur and Patan and looking at beautiful temples, I realized that they feel kind of empty and lifeless. After experiencing the mind expanding vistas of Tibet, liveliness of monasteries, Stillness of Mt. Kailash and luminosity of Lake Mansarovar, these seemed meaningless to me. I also noticed that I did not turn away from the eyes of hungry beggars, or avoid breathing the polluted air, as I had done before. Aversion seem to have been replaced by openness and equanimity, and more receptivity to the continuum of suffering and bliss present in the unfolding of life. Yatra has made me a ‘traveler’ out of a tourist.

I am sure that His Holiness is right when he says that people can practice their religion and transform themselves effectively by staying at home. However for me, the life and practice came vividly alive through this yatra and immersion in the energy of different sacred places forced me to let go much of my baggage. The words of Milarepa, the great Tibetan yogi and saint, went through my mind: “Just to leave home (place of familiarity and habitual life) is half the Dharma.”

Namaste!

Ayam Atma Shantah – Nature of Self is Blissful Stillness.

sarve bhavantu sukhinah – May all be Happy and Blissful.

My reverence for Padamsambhava started early in life. I practiced Tantra (has no relation whatsoever to Western-Tasntric-Sex) for over a decade and followed the path of Guru Gorakshnath. Tantra means “to weave” and “to transform or to transmute”. Tantra tell us that we all are woven into one interconnected endless web of life-force or energy. A Siddha uses energy to transform their limited self and ordinary-awareness to the unlimited-being-of-joy. Every aspect of universe, light, dark, neutral, inner, outer, happiness, suffering, familiar and unfamiliar is a source of energy that a Siddha can skillfully use to transform their limited “sense of self” to “unlimited One”. Cosmology of Tantra is holographic, ie., All are embedded in One and One is present in all. As per Tantra, the nature of our Self is luminous and all-knowing and goal is to realize the luminosity within. The mantra om-mani-pade-hum (praise to the jeweled lotus) symbolizes the same, the ‘jewel’ stands for ‘luminous self’ and lotus is the ‘body’.

Padamsambhava was great Tantrik from India. He is considered the founder of Tibetan Buddhism. According to a legend, local Bon Po deities and demons were against the introduction of Buddhism in Tibet. They destroyed every at night what was being built during the day. The king consulted Santarakshita, an Indian monastic, who advised that the tantrik mahasiddha (great adept) Padmasambhava be requested to comer from India to tame local deities and transform them to the service of Buddha-dharma.

Padamsambhava journeyed throughout the Tibetan landscape subduing and transforming a succession of named deities at specific places and created Tibetan Buddhism. He determined the way in which these beings are now perceived and treated, in visualization, the making of representations and in other practices of Tibetan Buddhism. This is the most important aspect of his work, and the reason why he is referred to as Guru Rinpoche (or Precious Teacher), being regarded as the “second Buddha.” He is considered the most important siddha, and is the central figure in the lineages that continue to preserve and transmit the siddha tradition.

I am very inspired by his profound wisdom, to see things clearly, and skills to integrate inner and outer forces and to create path for realizing our true self. His deep compassion for suffering of all sentient beings is incomparable. On his way to Tibet he stopped at Muktinath to mediate and then went to Kailash and Samye. Following his, footsteps I decided to go to Muktinath.

Muktinath is a sacred place both for Hindus and Buddhists located in Muktinath Valley at an altitude of 3,710 meters at the foot of the Thorong La mountain pass (part of the Himalayas), Mustang district, Nepal. It has 108 natural springs and fire comes our of ground (due to natural gas). It is a very important place of Dakinis, goddesses known as Sky Dancers.

On my way to Muktinath, I met a French-Canadian couple from Montréal, Chris and Martina (of course names are changed for the blog). We started talking about our journeys and quests. I found that they met in Jan of 1997 (same month and year when I and Shaz got together). While talking, Chris asked me about my journey as to why I went to Fes and now to Muktinath. I explained that in one of my inner journeys I had visions of geometric forms and traditions that were from Arabic and Andalusian cultures. His next question was what type of jouenry? And I explained that Dr. Stanislav Grof has devloped Holotropic Breathwork which allows access to nonordinary states of consciousness using specific type of breathing combined with music and movement.
And in Visionary Craniosacral School we combine the Holotropic Music with Craniosacral work to create an inner journey to access nonordinary states of consciousness. Dr. Stanislav Grof believes that fifty percent of traumas that we go through in life have root in the first nine and half month of our life in womb (more about this is in the book ‘The Holotropic Mind’). I had no idea at that time as to why I was explaining all this to them. I know that many of my traumas in life are related to early stages of my life as I was born very sick and weak which kind of helped me to learn ayurveda, yoga, tantra and pranayam at very early age. I also know that there are no coincidences and questions have many levels of meanings.

When we started the journey from Jomsom (900 meter below Muktinath), Martina was complaining about nasal congestion. By the time we got to Muktinath she was feeling dizzy, tired and out of breath. However, on the side Chris and I were feeling very calm, blissful and expansive. After lunch at Muktinath we started to head downward for Jomsom. Martina was not looking very good. She told me that she has problem of asthma and the air at Kathmandu had triggered it and the altitude of Mukitnath has made it worse. She was in pain. Next day, she looked really bad and I offered to do some cranial work which she agreed to as she was taking many medicine it was not helping her.

In the Cranial Healing session I had strange feeling that her condition was very old. Maybe even before her birth. After the session she was able to breath from both nostrils and said, “I feel my energy is coming back”. Next day she was looking much better and recovering quickly. Later, at the dinner Chris told me that Martina’s mother use to somke when she was pregnant and he thinks that is the cause of her Asthama. Now everything connected, the questions, my responses and what I felt in the Cranial Healing session. I quickly realized that Chris and Martina have always thinking that due to her mother smoking habit she has been suffering from Asthama. However, I know that we choose where and how we are born. I told her that what you are going through is a symptom and blaming your mother will not help you. You need to look deeper inside and see what is the learning for you.

We are not randomly thrown into some womb and then judged upon our actions. We choose were we want to be so we can learn and grow. It is easy for us to blame something or someone outside instead of looking within. We have to understand the choices we made if we want to be free. Yes, there are things that we can not change in the journey of this life, however we can learn and grow from everything. Our true essence is love and light and until we realize our true nature we will have to learn from every choice we make.

I wonder what is more spiritual than finding our true nature, who we really are? What is the nature of love and light that hides behind the veil of our personality built by the choices we have made? To me any path that help us in uncovering our true nature is a spiritual path. This was the key learning from me from Muktinath. Now, I must wait to understand how my rest of the yatra unfolds.

In last twenty one days I have been fortunate to wake-up in three different continents, North Africa (Morocco), Europe (Andalusia) and Asia (Nepal). The experience of my first day in three unfamiliar places and energetic places made me realize the meaning of “Dreaming”. It made me ’see’ what make us seek ‘familiar things’ or hold-on to my ‘little identity’.

We left San Diego on April 9th at 9am and after three flights, two trains, and two taxi rides, we reached Fes (Morocco) on April 10 at 9pm. We were completely exhausted, tired, hungry and ‘out of our mind’. The smell, sounds and sight of Medina shifted my ordinary awareness, a part of me went into medieval time and city. Something made my inner-sense feel at home. At the same time my ordinary-sense was worrying about how will reach our Riad (the B&B) and will we get any food as it already past 9pm.

After unloading everything we somehow communicated that we are very hungry. So, the old man again took us back through another set of winding lanes to a restaurant. By the time we reached the restaurant it was 10pm. As I enter the restaurant the first thing I hear is loud belly dancing music and my heart missed the beat at the sight of scenary. It was a beautiful Dar (Dar is same as Riad, a traditional Moroccan house, only difference is that it does not have garden in the middle-courtyard) with high ceilings and amazing Moroccan-Arabic artwork with vibrant colors. In the courtyard there were around 40 people sitting in traditional low Moroccan seats. There was beautiful Moroccan women performing belly dancing on live music played by a band of Moroccan musicians. I looked at Shaz and her eyes were wide open with a big smile. We sat there for one hour easting khus-khus and vegetables, listening to music and absorbing the performance of various artists. Somewhere in that hour I completely forgot about my exhausting travel from San Diego. I even lost my sense of where I was and what was time or place. I could sense the “Dream” of place and of my self. I was aware of both the present time as well as timelessness.

While walking back to our Riad I remembered the words of Arny Mindell: “The ‘yes and no answer’ to reality is that you and I are people. We come from the same or different nationalities, age groups, genders, sexual orientations, religions, mental and physical health, and so forth. ….But this is not the whole truth. These are just the yes-and-no-answers, the ones that fit our legal systems and political realities worldwide. The whole truth includes the viewpoint of Aboriginal Australians, Zen Buddhists, and native peoples everywhere. That whole truth includes the Dreaming that created each of us.”

Arnold Mindell says that we don’t stop dreaming in the morning. In fact our unconscious continues to dream while we are in our ordinary-awareness. Our Dreaming process creates reality around us is not just limited to our state of sleep. He says our dreambody (which is our energetic-subtle-body that has all the chakras, Kundalini and capable perceiving symbols and archetypes) is continuously dreaming however, it’s our ‘little ego’ in ordinary-awareness that does not see the ‘dreaming process’ so that it can stay in the ‘familiar world’ or “common reality”.

A Sage will tell me, “can you see the right and wrong , can you see the good and bad, light and shadow? Can you see the dance ?” Can you “be the Dance“?

A Seer will suggest, “you see right and wrong, light and shadow, because they are in ‘you’. Your ’self’ is identifying through them. True Self is the Witness. True Self is the Stillness in your heart. Can you be the Witness? Can you be the Mountain?” Can you “be the Stillness”?

Siddha will point to me, “what is light and shadow? what is right and wrong? Nothing but energy! Everything is energy. Stillness is the source and Energy is the Spring-of-Life! Can you flow freely like a Spring?” Can you “be the Spring-of-life”?

first, last, outer, inner, only that
breath breathing human being.” ~ Rum

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Our journey of life passes through many refuges, some give us happiness and some cause us to suffer. This sacred journey often make us to look for a path that will resolve our suffering and connect us with continuous source of happiness. In my journey, I have come to realize that this seeking unfolds into four ways of perception:

The way of Sages: is the most ancient, and universal  where man is engaged in a dance – the dance of devas (light) and asuras(dark), right and wrong, good and bad, affirming and denying. Sages, tell us that we can find happiness if we align ourselves with light and avoid shadows. It’s the path of virtuous discrimination and sages also tell us that light will never stay at one place and shadow will some day loose it’s darkness. Happiness is something you always seek but never can hold on to. It comes and it goes away. We are filled and then emptied. Things are always in flux and we have to keep dancing and this dance-of-life keeps us going.

The way of Seers: These men were called ‘aranyakas’ or ”the forest dwellers”. These seers wrote Upanishads and defined the various paths of Yoga. Their insight tells us that we are experiencing light and darkness outside because it is inside us. It’s our desire from within that makes the outer world go around. There mantra is “I am that, you are that, Self is that and That is that”. Self-realization is there path. “I am  suffering” and “I am happy” because my ‘Self” has identified with the suffering and/or joy. It is matter of orienting the Self within to change the without. To them happiness and suffering are the pointers of our inner-compass that we use to align ourselves within. The true nature of our Self is Luminous-All-knowing-Bliss (satchidananda). As long as we reside in our True-Self, with complete stillness, we experience the endless joy of bliss. Any movement from this state will put us back into the dance-of-life.

They way Siddhas: A Siddha follows the path of Tantra which means “to weave” and “to transform or to transmute”. They tell us that we all are woven into one interconnected endless web of life-force or energy. A Siddha uses energy to transform their limited self to the unlimited-being-of-joy. Their wisdom says that every aspect of universe, light, dark, neutral, inner, outer, happiness, suffering is a doorway or a portal that we can skillfully use to transform our limited “sense of self” to “unlimited One”. Their cosmology is holographic: All are embedded in One and One is present in all. Everything originates from Stillness and is dissolved into it. We make our heart still and the Spring-of-life will flow freely. Here are the beautiful words of Pema Chödrön (which reflects the way of Siddha):
“When we examine this process we learn something very interesting: there is no resolution. The resolution that human beings seek comes from a tremendous misunderstanding. We think we can resolve everything! When we human beings feel powerful energy, we tend to be extremely uncomfortable until things are resolved in some kind of secure and comforting way, either on the side of yes or the side of no. Or the side of right or the side of wrong. Or the side of anything at all that we can hold on to.

But the practice we’re doing gives us nothing to hold on to. Actually, the teachings themselves give us nothing to hold on to. In working with patience and fearlessness, we learn to be patient with the fact that we’re human beings, that everyone who is born and dies from the beginning of time until the end of time is naturally going to want some kind of resolution to this edgy, moody energy. And there isn’t any. The only resolution is temporary and just causes more suffering. We discover that as a matter of fact joy and happiness, peace, harmony and being at home with yourself and your world come from sitting still with the moodiness of the energy until it rises, dwells and passes away. The energy never resolves itself into something solid.

So all the while, we stay in the middle of the energy. The path of touching in on the inherent softness of the genuine heart is to sit still and be patient with that kind of energy. We don’t have to criticize ourselves when we fail, even for a moment, because we’re just completely typical human beings; the only thing that’s unique about us is that we’re brave enough to go into these things more deeply and explore beneath our surface reaction of trying to get solid ground under our feet.”  Excerpted from The Answer to Anger & Aggression is Patience, Pema Chödrön, Shambhala Sun, March 2005.

The way of Sufis: These have been least understood and they have managed to stay under the radar in every age, including present day. There message and importance in the eastern or western cosmology has never changed. Their mode of passing wisdom has also stayed same – master to apprentice. One-on-one. They have been given many names, mystics, sufi, sant, gyanis, gurus, baba, bhakta, sai, pir, faqir, master, etc. they perceive every individual has unique relationship with the One. It is through this unique relationships that One becomes many. “One and many” is nothing but a play of love. Everything is One and the difference is “degree of Love” in the relationship. The self is limited by the love one has realized for the Beloved . Our actions are defined by our “sense of self” we think “I am doing it” and Sufi knows that “Beloved is making us do everything” Suffering and Happiness are perceived different because there is “I” or sense of limited-self. To Sufi they are one and the same as they both come for the Beloved. Here are the two poem of Rumi expressing the Love and Grace of the One.

Two Poems by Jalaluddin Rumi:

THE EMBRYO
When the time comes for the embryo
to receive the spirit of life,
at that time the sun begins to help.
This embryo is brought into movement,
for the sun quickens it with spirit.

From the other stars this embryo
received only an impression,
until the sun shone upon it.
How did it become connected
with the shining sun in the womb?

By ways hidden from our senses:
the way whereby gold is nourished,
the way a common stone becomes a garnet
and the ruby red,
the way fruit is ripened,
and the way courage comes
to one distraught
with fear.
MATHNAWI I, 3775-3782

What Was Said to the Rose
What was said to the rose that made it open
was said to me here in my chest.
What was told the Cypress that made it strong
and straight, what was
whispered the jasmine so it is what it is, whatever made
sugarcane sweet, whatever
was said to the inhabitants of the town of Chigil in
Turkestan that makes them
so handsome, whatever lets the pomegranate flower blush
like a human face, that is
being said to me now. I blush. Whatever put eloquence in
language, that’s happening here.
The great warehouse doors open; I fill with gratitude,
chewing a piece of sugarcane,
in love with the one to whom every that belongs!